priceless moments

it was while we were putting on her jammies that she informed me that when she was older she was going to marry max. i like max, so i'm kind of ok with her choice of possible partner. so i smile and ask, "why are you going to marry max?" "well in case no one else wants to marry me someday, then at least i'll be married to max." hmmm...this troubled me a little as i am a firm believer that no one ever NEEDS to get married in order to define oneself as a whole person. but how do you explain that to a 4 year old? so i did the best i could, as i often find myself doing when it comes to being her mom. it wasn't a very long conversation that went something like, "i'm sure when you're ready you will have many people that would love to be your partner in life." she looked at me with her head a little cocked and her nose a little crinkled with that, "huh" in her eyes. nevermind.

it was while we were singing songs that same night that she asked, "mom, when can i have a baby in my belly?" yep, i believe it was somewhere between twinkle twinkle and abc's. with a little laugh, a big smile, a squeeze and a kiss, i informed her that it would be a very very VERY long time til she could have a baby in her belly!

she had a beautiful smile.

her name was annette. i worked with her for the past three years. she gave great hugs. big strong real hugs. she made me laugh. she asked personal questions and expressed concern with the curve of her brow. she was a mother and a grandmother. she used to say to me, "you go girl!" on days that i wore my cowgirl boots to work.

annette's funeral is tomorrow. she was 60 when she passed away unexpectedly this past saturday morning. i never got to say good-bye, and that makes me a little sad. i know that she's not in pain and that wherever she is she's smiling, and that makes me a little less sad. i'm going to miss that smile of hers...it really was beautiful.